The Terrible Catsafterme

Brad's Musings and Meanderings

random acts of quoting

"You can trust me insipidly." - Oliver Hardy, "Our Relations"

da16After driving all morning toward our destination on Sunday, July 12, 2009, the first thing that Bob and I did was obvious when we arrived in Las Vegas around noon: find an all-you-can eat sushi bar. We chose The Sushi Factory, the same spot we had previously enjoyed during our 2007 visit to Las Vegas. It was just as good as I remembered as we scarfed down the various delicacies. I mostly stuck to the expensive specialty rolls – which made up for the reasonable $21.95 lunch fee. Amidst the volcano, caterpillar, 310, the dynamite, and the myriad of deep fried, eel sauce doused raw fish, I was one happy camper. Still I didn’t quite stuff myself the way had during my previous visit.

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One of the many delectable rolls

It was about 1pm when we headed toward our lodgings for the next couple of nights at the Paris Las Vegas – some pretty nice digs at a pretty reasonable cost for the weekdays. Bob and I were pretty exhausted (and full) so we decided to take a bit of a power nap for an hour or so. Then we stopped at Best Buy so I could pick up a battery charger for my camera. You might recall that I left that little bastard at home. The replacement was $45 – and it ended up being defective. More on that later.

At 4pm was the performance of Disney’s The Lion King at the Mandalay Bay. This Broadway version was a lavish production with human actors, which mirrored the story and songs from the Disney animated film – with additional songs thrown in for good measure. I quite enjoyed it. After the show we walked around the casino a bit looking for the Fight Museum which no one seemed to know where it was located. We never found it either. When we left, we noted the temperature in the parking garage was 120 degrees.

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After The Lion King show

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Three boobs at Mandalay Bay

Although still a bit full from the sushi, Bob and I headed out to dinner at Lawry’s for some prime rib. It was good but I was rather irritated when they offered me some peas and/or corn when they were cutting the meat. I accepted and then was charged more than $10 for them. Displeased, I decided then and there that I was not born and bred for meals that cost $55 – and counted my days at Lawry’s as over.

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Prime rib paradise at Lawry’s. Creamed corn, apparently, is never without cost.

All was well that ended well though, for after dinner Bob and I made our way to the Mirage to catch the 9:30 performance of Love, the epic Beatles Cirque du Soleil performance. We had attempted to see this show during my 2007 visit to Las Vegas, but were stymied by the facility fire sprinklers that went off during the show, ending it midway through. It was a great show, but the highlight of it is definitely the Beatles music and from what I understand the acrobatic performance itself is just ‘so-so’ in the Cirque du Soleil world. The show ended a little after 11pm and we made our way back to our hotel. It was 102 degrees outside.

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Another crack at Love

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Vegas at night

The next morning, we had a leisurely start as we waited for my batteries to charge in the defective charger. I was able to mix my new adapter with Bob’s charger to finally get it to charge. But being a cheapskate (especially after the catastrophic bankroll blow of Lawry’s), I decided to just simply return the charger for a refund and find an alternative to make sure I could take pictures all week. That was our first stop of the morning – back at Best Buy. We also stopped at a half-price ticket kiosk to get some of our tickets for the day.

It was 11:30 by this time so we headed over to the Hard Rock Cafe on Paradise Road (my seventh of the year). I enjoyed my standard fare – the Hickory BBQ Bacon Burger. Now this was a meal! I also did my typical spin around the joint picking out the Big Seven memorabilia – with the addition of a bonus to honor the recently departed Michael Jackson.

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The Hard Rock Las Vegas

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The Hickory BBQ Bacon Burger is only one door away

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Planting the Las Vegas flag

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These KISS costumes were worn by the band during their 1998-99 Psycho Circus tour. This very makeup was personally applied by Paul Stanley himself.

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With some 1960’s Yellow Submarine paraphanelia

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These shoes were used and signed by Michael Jackson during the Bad cover photo shoot

After lunch, Bob and I stopped at Albertsons grocery to pick up some items for Jack Hanlon. Bob is always kind enough to bring a supply of food whenever he goes to visit this former silent Our Gang member. Jack is one of the nicest guys you will ever find, and I was very pleased to be able to hang out at his place for the third time (having previously visited in 2005 and 2007). And again I was pleased to find one of my issues of Dante’s Info – the one in which I did an article on Jack – sitting on his coffee table.

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Bob picks up some groceries for Jack. When he went to check out, he only had to remove three items that I had secretly thrown into the cart, among them a can of olives

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I love this photo of Jack, with his leg comfortably thrown over the chair arm, casually chatting with Bob

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My pal Jack

It was around 2pm when we left Jack and headed to the Venetian on the strip. We walked through it (twice passing the big Phantom poster that I was pictured with here) as we made our way to and from Madame Tussauds, the world famous wax museum. I don’t often visit wax museums, but I must admit that they are a guilty pleasure. This one was extra cool because in addition to the figures being so ridiculous lifelike, you are actually permitted to go up to them, touch them, and pose for pictures next to them. As you can see from the photos below, I might actually be able to fool some people in believing that I met these folks. But I wouldn’t. Journalistic integrity, you know.

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At Madame Tussauds. Note Whoopi Goldberg standing behind me.

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This was an amazing likeness of Hugh Hefner. Do the bunny ears look more or less dashing than the cowboy hat?

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At the time I thought this was one of the Girls Next Door, but later found out it was Jenna Jameson. Really though, who gives a crap?

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer was good enough to bite

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I told Paul Newman hello for my friend Heidi

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“Check out the beanie on that one…”

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Hangin’ with the Kennedys

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“Eight years? Really?”

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As close as I’ll get…at least for a while

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I have to hand it to Bob. This perfectly timed photo of me waiting to cross the street after this truck passes really creates the illusion that I was hypnotized by these scantily clad vixens

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There’s me hangin’ on the Strip

Continuing my series of visiting former convention sites, Bob and I stopped by the Palace Station, my third site of the year. This was the site of the 1992 Las Vegas convention. Much of it looked the same and particularly remembered the escalators leading up to the conference rooms. The rooms have movable walls so nothing looked quite the same, but nonetheless it was cool to visit. I also put a couple bucks into the poker slots here, the only time I gambled in Vegas this trip. To counterbalance my win in Atlantic City the month earlier, this time I lost quickly. No fun.

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Back at the Palace Station, 17 years after the scene of the crime

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Addressing the crowds, discussing my former experiences at this hotel…

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…and here are the crowds

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The inexplicably memorable escalators

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Losing a couple of bucks in Vegas

Although we had already been to the ticket booth once, Bob and I had to return when I decided to see Penn & Teller for my fifth time. I couldn’t convince him that the five new illusions (!) would make the show worth seeing, so he picked up tickets to Howie Mandell. If you’re keeping track, it was 111 degrees at this point.

Bob then dropped me off at the strip so I could have a look at the other Las Vegas Hard Rock Cafe. This one unfortunately was not yet open for restaurant business, but the shop was selling souvenirs. I looked around and got a picture outside of it, but then consigned it to my bucket list for a return visit at another time.

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Site of the future Hard Rock Cafe on the Strip

I met up with Bob and we grabbed a hot dog at Nathan’s, my second dog from this famous restaurant this year – the previous one being during my trip to Atlantic City in June. We ate as we walked to the Excalibur to catch our Louis Anderson stand-up comedy show. I had purchased a photo of Louis with the hope of meeting him before the show. The last time Bob saw him, he was offering a meet and greet and photo op before the show for $20. Now this was only available by upgrading to a V.I.P. ticket that was about $75 more than what we paid.

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Nathan’s. Hot dog. Hell yeah.

But despite being disappointed about not getting to meet him, I still enjoyed the 7:00 show, although I have to say that he is the laziest and most lethargic comedian I’ve ever seen. I thought he was just going to lay down and take a nap on the stage. He had me laughing out loud on several occasions, particularly when he did his bit about wrestler Ric Flair.

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Unable to meet Louis Anderson – but to be fair, this poster was about the same size as he was

The show ended after about 75 minutes. I waited around for about 10 minutes to see if he might come out so I wasn’t stuck with the goofy looking unsigned head shot of his, but no luck. I hightailed it out of the casino and caught a cab to the Rio. We fought our way through the insane Vegas traffic disaster and I made it just in time to cash in my ticket voucher for the show (I had tried to do this earlier but the P&T box office was closed, and I didn’t know to go to the casino box office). My seat ended up being outstanding – as was the show. Read more about my Penn & Teller show and encounter here.

After Bob was finished at his Howie Mandell show, he picked me up at the Rio and we headed back to the Paris. Bob had dinner at the hotel, but I went up to bed, having had an exhausting and rewarding two days in Las Vegas. It was 11:30 and 101 degrees.

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Farewell. We’ll always have Paris.

My trip will continue back in California

7 Responses to “What Happens in Vegas…’09”

  1. The bunny ears – now THOSE look foolish. Far less dashing than the cowboy hat.

    Peter

  2. The Kennedy’s are looking well!

    Dave Chasteen

  3. Thanks for the Paul Newman picture! That was very thoughtful and much appreciated.

    Heidi

  4. Brad — Your travelogues of Italy and Vegas are hilarious and I would love to talk to you about possibly contributing a photo to our new travel humor site. Can you please email me with your email address — I could not find it any where. Thanks!

    Darren

  5. I have to admit the best part of the trip was when the waitress asked if you wanted “additional sides” and you asked for two. I even said are you getting two sides. And you barely touched either one of them. And then you were so surpised they charged for them. That was why they finally brought you a menu. As Alan Hale said to the boys in Our Relations when they complained about the cost of the straws, “You don’t think we’re givin’ ’em away, do you?”

    You will be much safer at the hard Rocks….

    Bob

  6. Wow – interesting comment from Bob with insight to the “sides incident.” To me, that evokes memories of when Bob offered his car and directions to the theater where David Garrison was appearing as he had to be at work at 6:30 am the next day.

    Always nice to get Bob’s different perspective on things…

    Peter

  7. As Minna Gombell says about Stan in “Block-Heads”…I’ll say he’s different!

    (and for the record the waitress never said ‘additional’, only asked if I wanted peas or corn. Oh, and the ‘waitress’ that Bob speaks of had a moustache)

    Brad

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